We all have been kids and a little part of those kids are still within. Our inner child. That little self of yours is still playful, spontaneous, joyful, and curious. But sometimes she/he is lonely and scared.
Who Is that kid?
Your inner child is that base fragment of your mind, formed when your thoughts and sensitivity were still developing. It’s the little version of yourself in its peak of absorbing the world around. (Think of your 5–10 years old self.) The inner child develops when one is experiencing emotions they can’t fully understand. Situations, feelings, and beliefs that we go through at that time get locked in our subconscious mind.
As we grow and keep those locked, we develop habits and patterns. Many times what our inner child carries is traumatic or caused by traumatic events, but not necessarily. It could be things you felt and unable to explain it yet, you buried them inside. We bury those emotions and feelings deep inside and we build beliefs on them that we carry through our adulthood. Beliefs that leave your inner child wounded.
Our sensitivity at that time is faster than our cognitive function. We experience emotions that we cannot connect to the logical explanation at the time. Our inner child builds the spectrum we see the world trough. Growing up and being an adult doesn’t mean you need to numb the child in you.
The thing is that this child is still there, and it could still be wounded. It shows up as yourself sometimes, in different situations. It shows up triggered by similar situations like the ones that got those unexplained feelings in the first place.
Sometimes we need to reconnect and help them heal or understand those feelings. Sometimes we need to reparent them. Not because our parents were not good parents but because our adult self is the only one that stays with the inner child throughout the whole life. Sometimes we need to rebalance them, we need to explain to ourselves, accept, and work on the feelings and emotions that have buried. We need to redirect those misguided thoughts to build inner harmony.
Reparenting our inner child is learning to love ourselves for who we are unconditionally, non judgementally as a parent would.
Is my inner child wounded?
A lot of people don’t realize that specific acts and beliefs are built on the emotions locked deep within. Childhood trauma. It doesn’t need to be the most dramatic version such as abuse, but any disfunction in the family could wound the inner child. Sometimes we are our own inner child abusers. The way we talk to ourselves is crucial for our inner children.
An inner child gets wounded by emotional neglect. Locked down emotions, never explained. Emotions suppressed, instead of understood. Your inner child wounds come to the surface triggered by experiencing the same emotions that we did as a child. Emotions, that we still can’t explain. Sometimes we act or think immaturely in stressful or emotional situations and then we ask ourselves Why did I do that? That’s not me. This is when subconsciously we realize that there is someplace deep in ourselves that needs deeper digging. That’s a sign that your inner child needs healing.
Why connecting with your inner child?
Connecting with your inner child is so important for personal development and balance in life. Many of our problems, personality issues are deeply locked in our childhood. Connecting to find what triggers them is the first step of understanding and healing ourselves.
What does my she/he want?
The only thing your inner child craves is emotional education. It craves understanding those feelings that were locked and buried. She/he wants to feel safe and accepted as every child. She/ he wants to be happy, joyful and loved.
Why healing my it?
Children have so much to teach us and your inner one is in that count too. She/he has so much to learn from you. Parts of ourselves that we forgot or abandoned growing up like feeling pure joy, curiosity about the world, playfulness, and spirit. When wounded it affects our behavior, self-love and acceptance, and our relationships with others. It’s not always an easy job to connect to your self deeply. More often digging in our souls is uncomfortable.
The truth is that our inner self is always speaking to us, but we have learned to ignore it pretty well. Healing your inner child will help you explain so many patterns in your life and relationships with others. It’s the first step to sell love. Finding your wounds and learning how to heal them. Releasing all the negative self-talk, all the old and unexplained negative believes that we have built about ourselves and the world. Healing it and learning how to nourish the little selves we have hidden in our minds will lead to acceptance and inner harmony. To change old negative believes and behavioral patterns we first need to acknowledge and accept them. Then learn how to work on them so we can get back all that our inner child has to offer for our adult life.
Your inner child should be the joyful part of you, the playful one…